Do I Know You?

Well… just met my 3rd uncle once removed today at Melbourne’s Chinatown. Initially I thought this dude was my mum’s brother so I was doing this out of obligation… and the prospect of a free meal. Later on a phone conversation with me mum, I found out that this bloke was her cousin (hence, the once removed status), not her brother. I went through so much trouble for this dude, rallying up my cousins and it turns out he’s as good as any random bloke. *grunt*

Either way… it’s still a free dim sum meal.

I met some cousins that I never knew existed. Some interesting characters at the table today. His daughter, Julia, owns a boutique in Perth and came over to RMIT to study fashion. Obviously a shallow ditzy chick.

Another cousin seemed like a nice, interesting dude studying film and television and has his own camera crew company. He’s filmed (and directed) some ads, short films and even music videos and he claims that he’s shot one video for some M’sian artist. Poor sap.

The uncle’s daughter’s boyfriend is Irish. Yeah, let’s toss in a drunken Irish joke here along with some leprechaun jokes.

The uncle’s an interesting character. Flipped burgers at Hungry Jack’s before, owned a Domino’s shop and currently driving a Prius as a taxi driver in Perth. Madly interesting.

Mum’s a bit on the quiet side. She ticked me off a bit when she said she wanted to give me and my couz English names. Dammit… I have no idea what dudes that give themselves English names just ‘cause it’s cool are thinking. If you seriously want to stop giving some guai lo a hard time pronouncing your name, sure thing, go ahead… but if you’re stuck in a country like Malaysia where Chinese names are common like cockroaches in a mamak stall, that’s just being a douchebag, man.

One dude that I know even stepped over the line and gave himself an English MIDDLE name… I facepalmed myself so hard when I saw it that I blew my head clean off my shoulders.

I’m not gonna say that we should be proud of our own heritage or anything… but at least be proud of the name that was given to you. Unless your name’s Goh Boy Boy. I do know a kid in my high school with that name. Now there’s someone that needs an English name.

End of rant.

I love dissing.

Peace out y’all.