As I walked on the brick-laden path out of the Flemington Racecourse's grand hall, I thought to myself on life after graduation. If all goes well this semester (that's a big IF), I will be graduating next year, in Malaysia.
Truthfully, I'm not exactly keen. I do admit I do have a tendency to not easily let things go. I've a very faultful, strong sense of attachment, despite the fact that I know, and not realize, that impermanence is permanent.
I've even told people that I have no intentions of attending my own graduation. I say it's a waste of time. A waste of effort, and well not worth the trouble. Or is that just the voice in the back of my head's way of saying that I can't let go? As I type this out even I don't know whether is that the answer to my aloofness towards this whole graduation.
I mean, you don't get to do it that often. You're probably going to only graduate once. Maybe twice, if you're taking Masters... or more, if you're looking for some Permanent Head Damage. Yeah, I know... old joke.
I realized that... most people that are graduating say nearly the same things. They just want to end the nightmare that is uni. Others want to move on in life. Get their paper, live life, but I've never really heard anyone in particular saying that they want to be a really, really successful person.
Maybe in their heads, their dreams just aren't structured into such a simple sentence, as success, is subjective. And I also realize... I have no such dreams. Sure I dream of granduer, but not the typical successful life kind. It scares me now that I don't want to accomplish anything in particular that is on a large scale. Sure I want to change the world, but in a completely unrealistic and irrational way.
Do I not have a dream?
Or did it die when I wasn't looking?
I don't know...
You tell me.
Peace.
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