The driver dropped me off once again at Kerama Hotel and I went into Al Falaq to have a bite to eat. Ordered a Zinker Special, yeah, it’s a rip off. Picture even tries to look the same. For drinks, gotta have that awesome avocado juice, son. Zinker was tight, way better than KFC’s nasty excuse for a burger. It tasted like it was made from the fresh ingredients and succulent chicken patty that appears in the commercial. Amazing burger. Rushdi came over as I was lapping up the dregs of my juice and we went over for some chai again. Snooped off into the alley behind for a slow drink once more.
I was planning to get some gifts today since my trip was about to come to an end. Unfortunately, my special wallet with the majority of my dough and my emergency plastic had gone missing. Not going to go into details… no one was hurt and that’s all that matters.
However I managed to get the cash back somehow but the search went on for quite awhile so we had run short of time and Rushdi needed a kurta for tonight’s shindig. Raashid came over with Bashir and we set off to Raashid’s place to grab the garment. Eventually choosing a kurta, Raashid sent me and Rushdi back to Panorama to chill, wait for the walimah and get there on our own. Sweet.
We watched TV, got ready and got a cab from the street to get there. Soon we found out that the kurta was made of material that pretty much protects you from the cold as much as I have a chance of nailing Megan Fox. Wait, those are pretty good odds…
Anyways, we got a cab, had really no clear idea where the hotel really was until Azhan informed us that it was near Al Rigga road. Luckily the roads in Dubai are well named and have signs pointing up to them unlike Malaysia going for insanely fantastic creative names like PJS 11/7 and Jalan Panglima 3 and amazing road signs that have trees brilliantly planted in front of them while the light’s out at night.
Funny thing happened when we were on our way to Flora Grand. We were on the way to Maktoum Bridge in the cab when the dude started signaling left. The car that was on that lane but behind the cab sped up and cut him before he could switch and we had to stick on the 2nd from the left lane. No biggie, both lanes were turning lanes, no love lost. The cab driver had different ideas though, he went ahead, stopped slightly in front of the black car that cut him and clicked his window down and started a conversation with the Filipino couple that was in that black car.
Now, in a funny Bengali accent…
Driver: You don’t see, I go to Maktoum Bridge?
Filipino #1: See what see what? (Not exact words)
Driver: *more heated argument*
Filipino #1: See what see what?!
Driver: You don’t see I go to Maktoum Bridge?
Filipino #1: You have passengers?
*Driver winds window up as traffic light goes green and speeds off*
Probably not much humor there but his accent made it really really funny. His other words while travelling were “Shit-te… too maach traafik”. Hehehehe…
Eventually we reached Flora Grand and the dude dropped us off at the main road and we had to skedaddle into the backstreets to get there. Eventually we got there, met up with Suheil while he was in the middle of a photoshoot with Shazia. Snapped a few myself but again, I’m not allowed to post it. But I did get this…
Suheil was baap with that Prince of Persia kurta!
Seeing that Shakir bailed out… It was a tad uncomfortable to be in the midst of strangers that we’ve seen trying to shred our friend into little pieces the previous night but at least Azhan, his loyal soon-to-be brother-in-law is coming! Wait, what… no, he’s not coming?! Like, what the fuck man. Anyways… we weren’t about to stick around so we congratulated him once more and bailed into the streets as Ashar was about to pick us up.
We waited awhile on the street for Ashar and he finally came. Dinner was a hard pick but we decided on the infamous Patan restaurant.
Damn it! There used to be a smiling goat there!
We reached there soon enough and Ashar ordered for us. Naans were of course there and dhal as well. See here, dhal that we get here in Malaysia is faux dhal. Dhal here in Malaysia is mixed with sewage water, rat piss and the secret ingredient is mamak fart. Dhal that was served that night was made by God for mankind to feast on. There was this mutton dish as well. Whole piece of mutton stewed in its own juices and the meat was soft and fucking amazing. The kebab was dry but not bad in its own accord, though. To top off that meal, a cup of Pakistani chai. Just thinking about it makes me want to spend another 8000 ringgits all over again. Amazing.
Ashar then suggested that we got time to go to the Mall of the Emirates and Madinat Jumeira to do my souvenir shopping so off we went. We stopped by Madinat first and went in to have a look see. Some shops were closed and others were closing. I managed to snag a stuffed camel for Piumi and then walked around some more.
Dim sexy lighting
Great ambience, bad for shots, sonnuvabeech
Impressive place to take your loved one too and burn your wallet into itty bitty pieces. On our way out I spotted this…
Aw damn the pic's sideways!
Yeah, that’s how I want my Dubai chai! In a pot that big and in a mug from Oktoberfest! Tea addicts forever dude! Later these dudes said that we were going to JBR. Upon enquiry of the full name, they just gave answers like “Jiant Boy Rods” or “Jiant Black Rods”. Didn’t sound really appealing. We went over to the famed Mall of the Emirates first but unfortunately it was closed. I wasn’t all that disappointed anyways. I’m not a chick on a shopping trip halfway around the globe.
I snoozed in the car and woke up periodically to see where we were and I remember seeing glimpses of the alleged JBR, which I had partially deduced a few hours back as Jumeira Beach Resort.
Eventually we reached Panorama and dropped me off. I stumbled once more past the hotel bar which was surprisingly full every night and not a hint of hookers in there. Didn’t even bother showering and crashed after changing.
Pretty boring day in Dubai, I know, but on a tight budget, you don’t go to swank hotels and sample the foreign chef’s latest creations. You know, I have to say that this trip is genuine as it can be. I got a chance to experience the tourist side and a shade of the resident part. I didn’t go to swank hotels and get pampered like a little diva. I got a chance to experience the true little beautiful things that Dubai can offer – the food, the weather, the view. All you need on a vacation is the ability to appreciate this and take in things at your pace and take the beauty of it in your mind forever. You don’t need a stack of green, you don’t need a yacht, you don’t need a personal masseuse, you don’t need a personal driver and you as hell don't need a chef to cook you salmon flown from Netherlands, caviar from the Marina Trench and ostrich groin from New Guinea. Money can buy that anyway in the world. But where can you get the local shit? Well, I just said it's local, ain't it?
All you need is good company, good food and drink and good sheesha! A moderate and extremely enjoyable holiday, for real. Peace out y’all!
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