Jason Statham is back once again to wow us with his slick driving skills that make the Paul Walker look like Jarvis driving Tony Stark, ass-kicking that makes Stone Cold blush and baldness that would make even Lex Luthor envious.
Huh, that’s a pretty slick intro, if I do say so myself. I astound myself sometimes.
Once again, Frank Martin is the Transporter and like all the previous movies, a reluctant one and one that is willing to break all his own rules, oddly enough. He is “asked politely” to transport some cargo in the trunk and a hot (and awfully freckly) Russian hottie, Valentina. As usual, it’s never easy. First movie he decided to help the chick out, he brought it onto himself. 2nd one he had an obligation and I think he was framed for it, I think… Now this one, is a bit more interesting, albeit innovative, involves a sort of chemical time bomb latched on his wrist and the chick’s that will blow them into next Tuesday if they get too far from the car. This restriction in their movement provides many incredible action scenes as Frank compensates for the lack of mobility outside the car and some rather amusing scenes as well.
Not as many fight scenes in this one as one would prefer, but it should compensate with the driving. Tarconi’s on board for this one as well and he’s still provides solid comic relief with his offhand statements and observations.
Ol’ Spiky’s Rating – 3.5/5 – A solid film. Good for wasting time, seeing as it is the holidays.
It’s an action flick, it’s one for the masses. Have at it!
Inspired by Cloverfield
Yep, these guys were either feeling the groove of Cloverfield or they just are the same dudes who did Cloverfield.
Not much I can say regarding the story, linear, predictable and downright fucking scary man! It’s friggin’ awesome in the scare department… After watching GP506, that faggy Korean movie, I needed a horror movie with some shock value and Quarantine delivered, motherfucker.
It’s a scarefest from 1/4th of the beginning and until the end. In Cloverfield at least they had the city to run around in, but you only get 4 floors and an attic in Quarantine, dude. It’s gotta be wicked.
Ol’ Spiky’s Rating – 4/5 - For those who loved Cloverfield and shock horror, this is the one.
I still can’t believe that there are twats out there who say, “I didn’t like Cloverfield because of the camera shaking all the time and I didn’t see the monster a lot”. Sagely advice for those paper here… Buy a skirt, wear it. Now you need to get out of the closet and tell your parents what you really are. Seriously. They won’t blame you, they’ll blame boy bands, Korea and perhaps most solo male artistes. If you’re a girl that DOESN’T like Cloverfield, then well, you’re just a wittle girl that got scared when the monstwer came out... Awww…
On a More Personal Note
Yes, movie review time is over. Now for a little me time. Mum called today while I was out. Told me that relatives were burning holes into her head and back for letting me off on my little adventure. Well, no offence to them, they’ve been kind, generous and caring but seriously, I am 20 years old and I am shifting the gears in my life.
I feel kinda bad putting my mum in this position but I promised myself that no matter what, I will have my adventure! Had a lot more steam when I was talking to my mum regarding these relatives but… I guess they only have my interests at heart but they should ease off the harsh words. People do crazy things for their kids. My adventure happens to be one of them. God bless me mum.
Peace out y’all.
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