Dear My Neighbor

Dear Neighborino,

I understand that sometimes I play my music a bit too loudly but that is only because I'm in the zone, playing bass and I sometimes need to hear the timing of the notes. The other times I'm pounding the techno and R&B loudly is because I am getting high on the music. I realize since you're mainland Chinese, I am most probably disturbing your conversations of disgustingly slurred and contorted so-called Mandarin with your "homies" back in red country.

I duly apologize if I have woken you up from your slumber, especially if I do so in the middle of the night, more so when it's past midnight. I have acknowledged your displeasure especially when you start pounding furiously on the wall when the music gets too loud so I turned it down.

However, I do not see a problem when I slightly raise the notch during the day time, especially around noon and late afternoon when I am not disturbing your slumber.

Therefore, before I leave, I am going to raise the notch the whole god damn day and when you knock that wall, I will knock back with a beat matching the rhythm of the song I am currently listening to until it finishes. God help you if you start knocking during the beginning of a Tiesto song or a Slipknot song because I will start hammering the wall with a damn steel pole if I have to get the right beats.

I hope YOU stop being such a douchebag and knock that shit everytime I turn it up ONE DECIBEL.

So help you God if you ever come knocking my door wanting a face to face 'cause the only face you're gonna get is the blunt edge of my bleeding bokken into your bleeding face.

Peace,

Your Disgruntled Neighbor