After the annual buffet dinner, once we were all fed and watered, Altaf had a slight disagreement with the food and I had to fetch these guys back. Either way, we were about to leave anyways as most of the guests were leaving. Oh right… something happened when one family was leaving. A particular one that I really don’t fancy. We all have those relatives, don’t we? One bunch that seem to stick out like a sore thumb. I’m trying to make this sound a bit more, uh, extreme, but this’ll suffice. You can relate, can’t you?
Lemme see… I’m related to them through my grandfather. That family consists of the descendants of my grandfather’s (Dad’s side) sister. On the outside, they seem like a middle-class family which works hard to maintain that status but below that… sheesh, it’s the kind of stuff that makes Bold and the Beautiful, Desperate Housewives and countless TVB serials tick.
Alright, so they were saying their goodbyes to my grandma, she being the host of the whole shindig. The family consists of my grandaunt, of course, and her kids, all grown up and have kids of their own. Her grandkids are pretty much my age. Most of them are quiet and reserved and quite well off. Studying, still in school and so on. There’s one of them, which dropped outta school. Now, this guy… hoo boy… There’s nothing I *dislike* (loathe and despise seem too strong a word at this moment) more than those rainbow-haired, Japanese/Korean wannabe, floor-sweeping-pants wearing buggers. That’s right. I have a lala cousin. Oh, the shame of it all. Now I know how it feels to have a skeleton in my closet.
Malays have their Mat Rempits and Indians have their rapper-wannabes. A village surrounded with banana trees and the main produce being coconut oil does NOT count as “da hood”, lads. Lastly, the Chinese have the lala zhais. I wonder if the other races are as shamed of their “eccentric sub-community”. I’m trying to be polite here, dammit. This guy didn’t do the usual lala thing and went to sell mobile phones or pirated DVDs. He went to become a protégé of an electrician, apparently. So, of course, my grandma jokingly asked him to come repair our stuff for free when the time is right. Alright, I wasn’t really there when the conversation went down, I just heard my mum and grandma talking about this the next morning.
Alright, here’s the kicker. Some part of the conversation, he called my mum and my grandma “leng lui”s. Chinks that are reading this are probably starting to vomit now or laugh uncontrollably. I mean, who the hell, in their right mind, calls their relatives (one being close to 50 and the other close to 70), beautiful girls?!
Seriously.
I swear that the hair dye that these lala people use seep into their brain causing retardation, further amplifying the damage that they were born with.
I’ll just leave it at that. Part II will come real soon, I promise. Peace out y’all.
No comments:
Post a Comment